Tuesday, February 24, 2015

Back with more GIANT TITS

I'd feel sorry for her, but we all get screwed in the manner we deserve.

Did you know that former football great Deion Sanders started a private school? And that he's running it into the ground? And he's doing it on reality TV? Neither did I. However, that fact that Dallas is a shithole has not escaped me, so none of this is really surprising.

Just a reminder: Facebook is still not your friend.

"“AmEx’s cachet with the affluent is not what it used to be,” said Jason Arnold, an RBC Capital Markets analyst. “AmEx has always enjoyed king-of-the-hill status, but that’s changed. They’ve seen more competition in the upper-end, and they recognize that they have to go elsewhere to fill that gap.”" Hah. Fuck you, American Express.

Metafilter Is Shit: the most-popular thread on Feb. 20 (by far) was this. And just like clockwork, the fucking dickweeds started arguing over the Monty Hall problem. Again, as they always do when it is brought up. Smart people often have tunnel vision and are thus not as smart as they think they are.

And should you ever need some Hindustani obscenities, here's a handy list, courtesy of a Reddit thread. Now you can go to Varanasi and get the shit beaten out of you. Better yet, tell Jimbo Wales these are complementary words. He goes to India frequently, and with any luck the shit will be beaten out of him instead.

Haramzada : Bastard
Harami : Ill-begotten or a Bastard
Bhadwa : Pimp
Madarchod : Mother fucker
Bhenchod : Sister fucker
Bhonsdi ke : Whore's Husband Or Someone born from a rotten pussy
Gandu : Ass, to describe someone stupid Example: Arrey Gandu dekh ke chal, meaning "Look and walk you dumb ass"
Chutia : Pussy
Kutia, Raand, Randi, Bitch, Rakhail & saali : Whore
Maarna, Lena, Dena, Bajana, Phatna : Mostly contextual, on the lines of "Put it up", "Take it in your mouth"

Thursday, February 12, 2015

"Social media" SHIT. All SHIT.

Think not?

Consider what happened to Justine Sacco.

And what continues to happen to Anne Hathaway.

Someday, I predict that Facebook and Twitter will either be outlawed, or subjected to heavy government regulation. So rub your Facebook stock certificates in your asscrack with slow satisfaction, because they won't last.

Tuesday, February 3, 2015


 How pathetic is the movie business? This pathetic.

If you think Harvoni is expensive, imagine needing to take ecumizulab.
Plus, one of the drug-company researchers has been editing the Wikipedia article.

 Oh, Bitcoin. You give us such lulz.

Hey, lady, don't hang out with web billionaires.

Not only is Winnipeg a frozen shithole, it's got other problems.

The My Little Pony shit just keeps getting shittier.

Insane Artist Corner:
A brilliant animator you've never heard of: Felix Colgrave.
He posts his work on YouTube because nobody cares.

Albuquerque! Such a nice place!

Thursday, January 22, 2015

This is what $30,000 looks like.

That's what a 28-day bottle of Harvoni costs at retail. It's the first really effective treatment for hepatitis C, and Gilead Sciences is charging more than $1000 per pill because they can. And despite its enormous cost, it's quickly becoming the top-selling prescription drug. (At least, that's what people without health insurance pay. People on Medicare pay "nothing", the government pays and it comes out of everyone's taxes. And people in countries with a national health service pay a tiny fraction of the American price, because other countries won't allow a drug manufacturer to screw people using patents. What, don't you enjoy being screwed?)

Hilarious LA Times article about the "drug war" in a "decaying area"; where I live. And PS, Rob Brown is an asshole.

Bay area "foodies" are disgusting. They cause idiocy like this to happen. Plus, foods that only poor people ate before, like kale and collard greens, are now being "gentrified". So fewer people can afford them.

If you think 4chan or 8chan are misogynistic and depressing, have a look at Wizardchan's "depression" section. A haven for the most antisocial, arrogant nerds you've ever seen. After that, no one can complain about /b/ ever again. (And yes, I know that moot recently "retired". Wish he'd take his dedicated fans with him.)

Something I bet you didn't know about Charlie Hebdo: they hated Apple, because Apple would not sell Charlie Hebdo on the Apple Store without reserving the right to censor it. And here are some of the cartoons they drew about the dispute.

Now it's being claimed that Miralax might cause autism in children. Everything causes autism, according to autism "experts" like mothers with autistic children (cough Jenny McCarthy cough).

Walmart is your friend. Walmart will not hurt you.

Why aren't you going to Ratcave? Are the beavers ruining your paradise?

Thursday, January 8, 2015

I heart your poopie

Yes, people get lost trying to find offices in the European Parliament buildings. A likely warning sign of a failing bureaucracy.

Pop quiz: who in this story is more pathetic, stupid and insane, the animal-rights people or the cops who spied on them?

"Data mining has become so sophisticated that campaigns can now target voters by mashing together public records with much more personal information from Facebook feeds and consumer reports that offer such nuggets as who has sterling credit ratings but hasn’t purchased a car in seven or more years. One company even wants to get into the political market by selling campaigns data that identifies which voters sought information on Viagra and other erectile-dysfunction drugs." So? Just vote dickless.

"What To Do When You Discover Your Co-Worker Writes Erotic Hulk Fanfic", my ass. If you look into Archive Of Our Own closely, you will find a story about the Hulk trying to stuff Loki up his ass. Fan fiction reaches its pinnacle of development.

Elana Pritchard, blah. Old Dick, yech.

2015 isn't especially wonderful so far, eh?

(BTW, if you love to read about Reddit's general idiocy and madness, try r/redditcritiques. We're posting our considerable database of Reddit scandals there, slowly. Feel it.)

Monday, December 29, 2014

Merry Ass-Fisting Day! Enjoy your milkshake!

Yes, that image was posted on 4chan. And it got some attention. (In fact, you'd be shocked to learn how many idiot pud-yanker manchildren maintain "cum jars". They honestly think their semen is "special" and "important", so they try to "save" it.)

Been on a commercial airliner lately? Wondered why all the "special fees"? It's because they're the only way the airlines can generate a good profit. And that's for one simple, harsh fact: no matter how much they complain about poor service, Americans want cheap fares above all. Live free or die, fuckers!

Violence! Crime! Terror! Bullshit!!!

Mr. Seastrand doesn't need to worry -- all he has to do is move to another state, and they'll probably make him a sworn police officer in no time. This "never be allowed to serve as a police officer again" crap only applies in New Hampshire. Then he can go back to doing disgusting things to teenaged girls.

"PlumpJack Winery in Napa Valley, the first high-end American producer to take a chance on screw caps in the late 1990s, was scorned for making the switch.
"We got faxes and voice messages saying 'Your career is over,' 'It's a screwy idea' and that restaurants would have to start charging a 'screw fee,'" said John Conover, PlumpJack's general manager." Yes, the wine business is (still) full of screaming cunt-boys.

Don't forget to donate to the Scrotum Warmer project.

And here's something to chew on for the new year:

"I'm a male in my early 20's. If you were to ask me who I am, the 1st thing I would instantly say is "I am an anal vore fanatic". It's who I am. It's my identity. Anal vore is my life, and it felt important enough for me to tell my friends and family."

What is "anal vore"? Look around Eka's Portal for a while and see for yourself. "Vore fetishism" is just as popular as "bronyism", but even more underground. And how does your insanity compare to that?

Sunday, December 21, 2014

Happy Mother's Day!

Want to figure out if a media report is a hoax or not? You could try Emergent. Be warned: it's crowdsourced, so it will only be as  "reliable" as Wikipedia or Reddit.

Oh, you think a highly educated Harvard professor would be wiser than to harass a Chinese restaurant for days, for the "terrible crime" of overcharging him $4? You would be wrong. The academic world is just as petty and stupid and hostile as any other world.

If you think PewDiePie is the worst of YouTube, consider the paranoid rants of this gentleman. Suddenly PewDiePie doesn't seem so awful.

The Consumer Electronics Show is fast approaching. And someone in the CES staff had the brilliant idea of creating a "meme generator". Which attracted considerable mockery.

Yes, you fucknozzles, people steal magazines from doctor's offices. Especially celebrity-scandal titles. Been doing it for decades.

If you really want to learn about the Sony Pictures hack in depth, this is your best bet. Don't bother with the Wikipedia article, it is being chopped at by two of Wikipedia's biggest assholes, "Everymorning" and Michael "Masem" Neylon. (The latter is a brony. I kid you not.)

And remember: boycott Seth Rogen movies. Because he's a pussy.

And go look at Ratcave, because you're a pussy.

Wednesday, December 10, 2014

hope it falls off

The bastards of the Illinois Assembly passed a law that made recording police on the street illegal, a court overturned it, and now they're trying again. (And I had to use a link to Reason, because there's been very little "mainstream" coverage of this.)

Good article about the stalling of progress. It's easy: baby boomers are old and in the way.

In case you need more reminding of why Mormon extremists are bad people, and Arizona and Utah can eat collective shit and die, read this.

Me sad, because more furry conventions don't get evacuated due to poison gas.

And I want to see Jeff Bezos, shoved entirely up an elephant's ass. Why can't we have these little things?

Tuesday, December 2, 2014

This is how you know a newspaper is a spineless shitrag.

When they run "apologies" like this.

And this is how you know Metafilter Is Shit: on Friday, their top-voted item was (predictably) about the fucking Star Wars trailer.

Meanwhile, someone tried to post a legitimate item about the Gilbert school board's book censorship, and that ugly asshole Matt Haughey killed it: "Sorry this seems like outrageous dumb thing that happened". Keep it up, Matt, you chode, great job so far!

All that crap about Buffalo's 10 feet of snow, and hardly anyone noticed this. Hey, that's the Buffalo we all know and love!

Deadly banana! Murderous toy gun! Oh god oh god, we're surrounded by terror and crime! Let's spy on everyone! Tell those Wonderful Men and Women Of Law Enforcement to go out and shoot some more 12-year-olds!

It's nice to see that Hobbs is still a dump. If I were him, I'd do a lot more than drink on the job and fuck patients. I'd nuke that shithole.

Speaking of which, anyone got some plutonium?
Because the government evidently doesn't. Or do they?

Tuesday, November 25, 2014


"Over the last fifteen months, the columns and op-ed pages of the New York Times and the Washington Post have bulged with the compressed flatulence of commentators intent on dismissing warnings about encroachments on civil liberties. Indeed, in recent months soi-disant liberal intellectuals such as Sean Wilentz, George Packer and Michael Kinsley have employed the Edward Snowden affair to mount a fresh series of attacks. They claim that Snowden, Glenn Greenwald and those associated with them neither respect democracy nor understand political responsibility." In short, American progressivism has a problem with its "punditry class". Another example of a "great empire" slowly fading away.

Meanwhile, the increasingly-disgusting NSA is spying on American politicians. And occasionally blackmailing them. And no one in Washington seems to care.

"These sources say the searches occurred individually and in small groups, and that the juveniles were asked to remove all their clothes, to squat, and to cough." Philly, baby! Anal searches on children!

Insane Artist Corner: Jonathan Payne's Fleshlettes. Yes, he sells them on Etsy.

One of the greatest Flash games ever made, now banned from the Android Store: Ass Hunter!

Do you like to see whiny little hipster fucks complaining about their balls? Consider what Drew Magary said after he had a vasectomy and developed a hematoma. The comments add to the fun. Manchildren really do think their deez-nuts are the Center Of The Universe. Hah.

Did you know that one of the major right-wing talk radio networks was founded by a nut who used to run a quack hypnotism scam? Read the story of Talk Radio Network; the outfit that first brought us Art Bell, then Michael Savage, and now gives airtime to Kevin Sorbo's wife and the security chief from Babylon 5. No, I am not making any of this up.

Could be worse, you could be stuck in North Dakota.

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What is the "point" of this? There is no "point". I suck, you suck, la la la.